Back | Forward

Ask Laurie

Q: Dear Laurie: Maybe I'm getting old (I'm 32), but, I've been divorced for 3 years and have just recently started going out again. Do the single women of today really put up with all this disrespect from men? I am constantly amazed at the use of the word bitch and the lack of everyday manners such as holding the door open for me and standing up when I stand. Women need to gain back what we've lost. The men I've met suck. Any suggestions for meeting nicer ones or how to get the respect we all deserve? Thanks for being here. Lonely in the Bluegrass

A: Dear Bluegrass-- First of all: Yes, Virginia you are getting old(er), but that has little to do with men calling women bitches and slamming doors in their collective faces. You write: "Do the single women of today really put up with all this disrespect from men?" I don't know Virginia, do they? I take my finger off the pulse of Single Women of America and all disrespectfulness breaks loose--well, I tell you! I went on the internet, just for the heck of it, and did a search on "bluegrass". Here's what I found--three bands: * Alive & Pickin' (kind of catchy huh?)
* Banjomania (like Beatlemania only no Beatle's songs and they use a banjo)
* Batteries Not Included Bluegrass Band (racy!) This information is more helpful than may at first seem apparent. You say you're three years post divorce--I'd say it's high time you did a little PICKIN' yourself and jump back into dating MANIA (banjo optional) and as far as the batteries go, well, no comment (wink wink)... I think you may be experiencing two common things that single women experience the world over: 1. Shock at jumping back in the dreaded dating scene. In your own immortal words, dating does indeed "suck"--yeah, yeah, yeah, I've gotten a lot of write ins to prove that theory... 2. Virginia, you're dating crustaceans posing as men! Merriam Webster's Collegiate Dictionary: crustacean 1. "any of a large class of mostly aquatic mandibulate arthropods that have a chitinous or calcareous" blah blah blah "THAT INCLUDES", and pay attention here, "wood lice, water fleas, barnacles, crabs" etc. etc. Sounds exactly like what you have described, does it not? I rest my case! The short answer: Virginia! Honey! Haul your ass out of the bluegrass NOW! Pack up your batteries and run, run, run.

Lovingly and logically yours, Laurie